I just read this:"Sometimes, when we are discouraged by a difficult situation, anger does seem helpful, appearing to bring more energy, confidence and determination. And while it is true that anger brings extra energy, it eclipses the best part of our brain: its rationality. So the energy of anger is almost always unreliable. It can cause an immense amount of destructive, unfortunate behavior."
— The Dalai Lama
I have often been mislead by my own anger or my friends' anger and thought to myself: "Hey, it's better than depression!"
My bad.
It's always better to sit with something than to react. Always. But funny how when you're in reaction mode, it seems so brilliant and empowering...
wait...this means that i shouldn't have.......(fill in the blank)
ReplyDeleteThat is so true...brilliant and empowering at the moment; embarrassing and humiliating later!
ReplyDeleteIf only I can remember things like this in the midst of one of those angry fits.
ReplyDeleteA friend told me ages ago to never react while emotional about something. It's been very good advice!
ReplyDeletePearl
That Dalai Rama is one smart guy. ;)
ReplyDeleteWe call my dad "Reactionary Gary" and I seem to have inherited most of his traits. Thanks for the reminder that I need to sit things out before responding...
Interesting...I have been reading a lot of Buddhist philosophies lately. I think its wild that we both posted something on this subject on the same day! http://42andstillbreathing.blogspot.com/2010/10/ohmmmmmmmmm.html
ReplyDeleteOH MY GOD THE DALAI LAMA SO GETS ME! Actually, this really ties in with what I wrote today. Kind of creepy...
ReplyDeleteI like this. It sums up why I don't bother to get angry very often. I don't like to waste all that energy on something negative. Spontaniety is more fun when it's around something positive anyway.
ReplyDeleteI think this quote from the Dalai Lama is incredibly profound (as are many of his teachings). A very important lesson for me to learn...
ReplyDeleteOf course, this idea is not exactly new...
A fool shows his annoyance at once, but a prudent man overlooks an insult (Proverbs 12:16)
A patient man has great understanding, but a quick-tempered man displays folly (Proverbs 14:29)
Better a patient man than a warrior, a man who controls his temper than one who takes a city (Proverbs 16:32)
My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man's anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires (James 1:19-20).
So true. For a time, I thought I was too passive, and I deliberately stirred up my anger so I could be more confrontational or competitive. What a waste!
ReplyDeleteI need this tattooed on my arm. Do you think they offer a family discount?
ReplyDeleteAlso, coincidentally, Steam Me Up Kid is what my dad used to say when he wanted one of us to get him angry, because all the extra energy made him feel alive. Then he'd go out and try to pepper spray the crows in the neighbor's tree, so I don't know what the DL was talking about eclipsing rationality. Pshht.
I read this yesterday on FB and sent it to the BF. These important messages always show up when we need them.
ReplyDeletePeace
Yeah, we're too often led into the trap that anger is an "active" emotion, and therefore good.
ReplyDeleteI've become better over the years of controlling the anger. But I often go into a shell when I do, and forget the extra energy part of it.
ReplyDeleteGood stuff.
@Char: Me too, sister.
ReplyDelete@Eva Gallant: Totally.
@a Broad: Yeah. That would probably help me too.
@Pearl: It's excellent advice. Now only if I could figure out a way to stick to it.
@Mel Heth: I'm going to start calling myself "Reactionary Mandy."
@Kenny: Maybe you're Facebook friends with the DL too...
@Kim: Okay. I'm going to have to read both you and Kenny since we're all on the same wavelength apparently. We should all hang out because none of us would instigate a fight right now.
@Wow: Your comment pisses me off.
*Throws head back. Laughs maniacally.*
@Jeff: There is nothing really new, just new ways of saying the same thing. Though I will point out that the Dalai Lama's faith is older than the bible.
@Blissed Out: Actually, if you think about it, there is nothing passive about learning to sit with anger and not snapping into impulsive anger. It takes much more strength to wait and consider than to mindlessly react. So it's an active passivity, if you will.
@Steam Me Up: Your name is the perfect complement to the Dalai Lama's status update!
@Nice Peace of Buddha: Yes, aren't they convenient that way?
@La Piazza: Interesting that active = good and passive = bad in our society. Active = strength versus passivity = weakness. It's not an eastern way of looking at things at all.
@so not that girl: Bwahahahaha! You slay me.
@Mobius: Actively sitting with an emotion is different than going into a shell. Fo' sho'.
He makes a good point. It's always better to lash out when you AREN'T angry. No one ever sees it coming that way and gives you the element of surprise.
ReplyDeleteI bet he's awesome in a street fight.
laugh! My bad indeed. Same here, sista.
ReplyDelete