But I am sick. I've been nauseous since April. And no, I am not pregnant. Ha ha. Very funny. And yes, I've taken a pregnancy test. Or two. But I'm definitely not carrying another child THANK BUDDHA. It turns out that feeling nauseous is actually a sign of getting an ulcer. Who knew? I thought it would be more of a burny sensation. So apparently being an anxious/stressy person can cause your stomach to eat itself. I learn something new every day!
So until I get this acid situation under control with medication and dietary changes, I'm trying to reduce stress. Part of that is doing decidedly less than I have been doing. I'm allowing myself not to do anything if I don't want to instead of forcing myself to do it all.
I don't want to take any grad classes this summer … so I'm not.
I don't want to work out. So I'm not …. not every day at least.
I don't want to write my book … so I'm editing instead.
I don't want to write in my blog … so I'm not. Well, not much.
I don't want to practice my mandolin … so I'm not.
I just want this summer to be about being lazy. Sure, I'll go to work but I don't want to do anything after work. I don't want to do anything on the weekend. I don't want any responsibility besides my husband, my children and the things I want to do.
Things I like doing:
Reading.
Gardening.
Watching Orange Is the New Black with my husband.
Drinking sparkling water.
Watering the flowers with my kids.
Spending time with friends.
This all feels so indulgent. But I think I'm tired, stressed out and I need to rest. I need to soak up time with my family. Time being outside while the weather is nice. Time sitting in temple with my sangha.
So that's what I'm gonna do. If you need me, you'll probably find me lounging on the couch or watering my front yard. Be sure to stop by and say hello, because suddenly I find I have some extra time.
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| More of this. |
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| Less of that. |
I love the lazy summer idea. And it sounds like you deserve it anyway. Reminds me of the "Summer of George" episode of Seinfeld, though I think he ended up in traction. So, uh, don't do whatever he did.
ReplyDeleteThe Summer of Mandy! I love it! Absolutely nothing can go wrong with this plan!
DeleteThis sounds like my life now... but instead of "enlightened" people just call me lazy and old. Maybe I should stop hanging out with them.
ReplyDeleteIn the land of the blind, the one-eyed man is king.
DeleteWait. Does that apply? Screw it. I like the sound of it. It makes me sound smart.
A Honey Don't List! Man, I would knock that one out of the park!
ReplyDeleteGood for you! Balance away!!! So many exclamations!!
Honey Don't List! I love it!
DeleteThis reminds me of something Meg said to me after I had Alexander...She said "you can't do everything, don't even try. If the laundry doesn't get done no one is going to die, you'll just wear dirty clothes."
ReplyDeleteExactly. This is why I don't cook very often anymore.
DeleteSometimes it is hard to remember and even more difficult to do, but we have to take care of ourselves first. Others may view it as being selfish, but that's their problem. Screw them. They can have the ulcers and everything that goes with it.
ReplyDeleteYEAH!
DeleteThat's awesome. My online yogi (hey, it's 2014) said something about how movement is good for the body, stillness is good for the mind.
ReplyDeleteI like that. A lot.
DeleteLook back on last summer, and vow to do 75% less. Want to borrow my hammock?
ReplyDeleteYes and Yes.
DeleteIf you're getting sick, and have been since April, then it sounds like you're doing exactly what you need to do, which is to only do what you feel comfortable doing and not doing what is stressing you and making you sick.
ReplyDeleteSpeaking of sick, the first attempt at writing my own book died with my harddrive. But I was able to get it recovered. The 2nd laptop was better and I made big progress. I really liked the direction the rewrite was going. Then it, too, died. And no, I had not yet made backups. But this time they could not recover any of it. This was devastating. So now I'm on my third laptop and trying to motivate myself to try again using my old files from the first dead laptop, desperately searching my memory for all the changes I made when I was feeling so good about my story and really getting somewhere. And this time I've joined an online cloud service that keeps backups of everything I write at all times. I'm sure you're smarter than I am and keeping good backups. But just in case, I highly recommend the cloud. I don't know if I'm going to be able to motivate myself enough for a third try.
I hope you have a great summer. No pressure, though. Have whatever kind of summer you feel like, OK? :-)
I'm all about the cloud, my friend! I also print out the entire thing every once in a while and keep a copy of that.
DeleteMy only reason for existing is to serve as a warning to others.
DeleteHooray! 'Atta girl! Resting and rebuilding are at least equally as important as working.
ReplyDeleteAnd feel better!
DeleteThanks!
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ReplyDeleteI love this. I think our bodies begin to rebel against us when we need to slow down. But eek an ulcer doesn't sound like fun at all - I hope that goes away quick! I need to make a list like this. It's funny how we resist giving ourselves permission to stop doing stuff. Enjoy your relaxation!
ReplyDeleteThanks, I will!
DeleteMy husband has told me for years that real success is living happily, enjoying time with family and garden and reading and other things that are, shall we say, life-affirming. The whole time I was working I could agree with him but could not manage to live that way. Now I do, and I am so much healthier and...blissed out.
ReplyDeleteI like the sound of this.
Delete